


Tightrope

by DragonHeartStringCore



Category: Doctor Who RPF
Genre: AU, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-06
Updated: 2014-02-18
Packaged: 2017-12-31 16:45:40
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 20,535
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1033986
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DragonHeartStringCore/pseuds/DragonHeartStringCore
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>AU where Alex never left Ralph because he didn't cheat on her and therefore she never had Salome.<br/>As her marriage begins to fall apart starting filming for Who might be just what she needed.<br/>Just in case this wasn't obvious - I know nothing of the actual real life lives of any of the people in this story and it is all fiction.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Tightrope (Walk the Moon)

**Author's Note:**

> Title inspired by the song 'Tightrope' by 'Walk The Moon'  
> My first mattex fanfic so might not be that good, despite the fact that these two basically write themselves.  
> All chapter titles are songs that remind me of Mattex and tends to set the mood I was aiming for in the chapter if anyone likes to listen whilst they read.

She was happy to be back playing River, she really was, but she was inexplicably nervous too. It was a whole new cast and they were all so young and relatively inexperienced. It didn’t help that Ralph had teased her about being a cougar just as she had got on the train to Cardiff, why he always played on her insecurities like that she would never understand. Lately, it had been getting worse, and if she was honest with herself she was glad to be getting away from him for a while.

She had felt better with David the last time she was on Who, not only because he was more her age, but she had watched his previous episodes, so had a much better idea of what she would be working with. But this new Doctor, Matt, he was much younger than she was, and she knew she could flirt with anyone, but with such an age gap she didn’t think it would really work.

She trusted Steven though; if he didn’t think it would be believable he wouldn’t have asked her back.

She would have to keep reminding herself of that today she thought as she opened the door to the read through.

* * *

He had made it through filming his first episode of Who without too much trouble, despite managing to snap off one of the Tardis controls in his enthusiasm. Moffat had told him to make the Doctor his own and not to be intimidated by the role, but it was easier said than done.

Today though was an entirely different matter, today was the day that Alex, THE Alex Kingston, would be joining them. He had watched a lot of her work before and knew what a fantastic actress she was, he'd loved her last episode on Who too. He was worried he wouldn’t live up to David, she was the first person he would be acting with from the old show, it felt like his first real test.

He looked up from his script as the door opened and his breath caught in his throat. He knew she was a beautiful woman but nothing prepared him for the real thing. The first thing he noticed was her eyes, it was like bolts of gold were swimming in a green sea. Then it was her lips, they were full and red and looked like they had a smile hiding in the corner. Her blond curls were wild from the Cardiff weather and her cheeks flushed, he had no idea how someone could look so perfect in a baggy black sweater and, oh god, those tight jeans, it was like she was trying to kill him.

Suddenly his phone vibrated on the table and he snapped out of his mesmerisation fast enough to notice that it was too close to the edge and was in the process of falling. He tried to catch it but his arms flailed and he went flying sideways off the chair to land flat on his face next to a pair of black converse.

He would have been happy for a hole to open up in the ground right there and then and swallow him up if it hadn’t been for the low throaty laugh he heard coming from above him.

* * *

“Would you like a hand?” she asked, still giggling. She hadn’t known what she would think of him but she certainly didn’t expect to be feeling this. He was charmingly adorable but something about him made her heart skip a beat, the way his eyes had gone dark when he looked at her, how sharp and defined his cheek bones and jaw were. She would have almost felt slightly intimidated if it hadn’t been for his subsequent falling. At least she felt relaxed now, this would be fine.

He took her hand as she helped pull him off the floor. “Thanks” he said, running his hand through his hair as the fits of laughter from the red headed scot continued in the background, almost causing her to fall off her own chair.

“Sorry about that." He apologised. "I would say this doesn’t happen often, but then I’d be lying.”

“Well I can’t say that I mind having a man fall at my feet”. She joked, causing Matt to chuckle, clearly feeling more at ease.

“I’m Matt by the way, and you must be Alex, I’ve really been looking forward to working with you, I’ve seen loads of your stuff, it’s great.”

“I’m glad to hear you like my stuff Matt.” She said winking as she sat in the seat next to the one he had just fallen out of and took out her script. 

He seemed initially flummoxed by her boldness so it surprised her when he leant down close to her ear and whispered “Your acting isn’t half bad either.”

* * *

The read through went better than he could have hoped for. Alex made it so easy, she delivered her lines perfectly and it made all their scenes seem so natural. He had been worried when he first saw her that he wouldn’t be able to keep up with her when it came to chemistry but he was surprised by how effortless it seemed with her. 

The script was fantastic, but he would expect nothing else from Moffat, and now he couldn’t wait to get started on filming this next episode. He already loved Karen and it would be even better now that Alex was here.

He was still buzzing off how well today had gone as he was striding towards his car when he had an idea about the shoot tomorrow that he just had to tell Steven. He swivelled on the spot, and just his luck, crashed right into Alex.

“We really have to stop meeting like this Mr. Smith.” She teased as she knelt to pick up the car keys he had dropped.

“Sorry about this, I really ought to start looking where I’m going.” He admitted as he bent to help her.

They reached for them at the same time and as their hands touched both of them froze, just for a second. He looked up and caught her eye as they stood and he could have sworn hers darkened, but he was probably just imagining it.

“Thanks.” He said recovering himself, trying not to let it show that his heart was going a mile a minute.

“No problem.”

“You were great today by the way, don’t think I’ve ever had such a smooth read through before.”

“That’s very sweet of you Matt, it’s more the script than me I think, Steven is such a fantastic writer and the story for this episode is great.”

He wanted to tell her how wrong she was, that yes the script was good, but he couldn’t imagine anyone else playing the role, and how every line she said made him tingle, but he didn’t want to come across like some fan boy with a crush...

“It is a good script isn’t it.” He agreed.

“Not just the script, the cast is great, you especially, don’t tell David but I think you may be one of the best doctors yet.”

He felt so happy to hear that, not just what she said, but the fact that she had said it. He didn’t know why, but for some reason, the words meant so much more coming from her.

“You have no idea how relieved I am to hear that, I’ve been so worried that I wouldn’t be able to pull this off.” He said, running his hand through his hair, something he realised was becoming a habit of his when he was nervous.

“I think you’ll do more than pull it off Matt, you’ll be amazing, I know it.” She said as she squeezed his arm, causing him to hold his breath, if only she knew what she was doing to him. “Anyway, where are you off to in such a rush?” She asked.

“Just had an idea for a slight script change tomorrow, I wanted to run it by Moff before he goes home.”

“Ah I see, and what would this idea be?”

“You’ll have to wait and see, let’s just say that if he likes it we will be crashing into each other a lot more tomorrow.” He said with a wink. She laughed at that, he loved her laugh already.

“Oh now I’m curious, but I do love a surprise.”

“Well hopefully we’ll use it, anyway I should probably get going, wouldn’t want to miss him.”

“Sure, see you tomorrow.”

“See you, was great meeting you.”

“And you.” She said as she started to walk away.

He had to admit that his first impression of himself could have gone better but he was chuffed that he had kept up with her today, she really was one hell of a woman, no wonder she was married to such an incredible actor like Ralph. His heart sunk at that thought, she was taken, and for some reason the fact that someone else got to love her and hold her made him sad.

His thoughts were cut short by his phone vibrating again. He remembered that he hadn’t checked it earlier after falling off his chair and saw that he had two texts from Daisy. His girlfriend Daisy. He realised then that he hadn’t once thought of her since he had met Alex this morning.

* * *

She was tired when she got back to the block of flats that all the cast where staying in during the shoot. She had only gotten the chance to drop her bags and grab a quick shower this morning before the read through so the place still looked a bit bare. She made a sandwich and got to work unpacking, it had been a long day but a very good one. The read through had gone better than she could have hoped and all the cast seemed great, especially Matt. She had to admit his abilities had surprised her, not only that but something about him made her feel so happy.

Today when they had touched hands in the parking lot she had been surprised to find that she got butterflies in her stomach and where their fingers met left a burning sensation. She thought he noticed it too but she was probably imagining it, her hands were probably just a bit cold is all, how could he ever be interested in her anyway, besides she was married, if you could even call it that any more.

Ralph and she had drifted apart in recent years, with all her trouble trying to conceive a baby and his career really taking off, they often didn’t see each other for months.

She was distracted by her phone going off and was surprised to see a message from Matt who had insisted that he take her number, just in case the weeping angels escaped from set and came after her.

_‘Get ready for some flying tomorrow!  X’_

She guessed that Steven had liked his idea.

_‘I look forward to it darling. X’_

And she really was, more than she’d looked forward to something in a long time.


	2. Tiptoe (Imagine Dragons)

She wandered into costume and makeup at 5am the next morning thanks to Matt’s plot suggestion, whatever it was. The whole crew apart from Karen were made to come in 3 hours early, something the scot had been most smug about last night when she came over to borrow milk.

Karen and she had got on well from the minute they met, probably due to a shared fondness of teasing Matt. She expected they would have a lot of fun both on and off set for the couple of episodes she was here for and, hopefully, it would distract her from thinking about her situation with Ralph.

He used to call her to see how she was whenever she went away to film but this time he hadn’t even texted her. It seemed small, but it was things like that which she missed most, even Matt had texted her last night, and he’d only known her for a day.

The door opened and she turned to see Matt wandering in with two cups in hand. She didn’t know if it was the smell of coffee or the glowing smile on his face but she perked up quite a bit.

“Thought you might need this” he said offering one to her.

“You have no idea, I know there isn’t a time difference between here and London but I swear I’m jet lagged.”

He laughed at that, “I know what you mean, although the 5am start doesn’t help.”

“And whose fault is that?” She questioned as she sipped her coffee, it was piping hot and somehow he had made it just how she liked it, strong with just a little milk.

“Ok Ok, I should have thought it through, but I guess the trade-off for my awesome idea was an early wake up.”

“Ah I see, so it’s awesome is it?”

“It most certainly is!” he said proudly.

“Any chance you’ll tell me this morning? I know it’s supposed to be the scene where River enters the Tardis so I’ve had some ideas.”

“Nope, but I’ll give you a hint, it involves wires.” He hinted, looking so happy at his secret, like a child who won’t tell you what present he got you for your birthday, she couldn’t help but smile.

“So flying, wires and crashing, this sounds painful.”

“Don’t sound so sceptical, you’ll have something soft to land on.”

“Well that’s comforting.”

At that point a girl from wardrobe came through and said they were ready for her.

“Right I better get to it, I’ve heard they’ve got a great costume for me today, can’t wait to get it on.”

“See you later Kingston” he shouted as she walked away. She liked how he called her that, it made her feel like they were old friends.

* * *

He was on set reading through his script wondering where she was, he’d been looking out for her for about half an hour now and she was still nowhere to be seen. How long could it take to get a costume on?

When he finally caught sight of her his jaw literally dropped, saying that it was a ‘great costume’ was a severe understatement. The black dress hugged her in all the right places and swayed around her ankles as she walked. He was going to have to kill who ever picked this out, how was he supposed to act when it had a neck line like that, cleavage was all he could see.

He was startled when Karen came up behind him and said “Watch out or you’ll start catching flies." His cheeks went red and he swiftly closed his mouth, hoping Alex hadn’t seen him.

“What are you doing on set? I thought you weren’t needed for another couple of hours.” He grumbled, trying to distract from what he'd just been doing.

“I have to be in make up soon and-”

“Knew you’d need a long time in there” He interrupted giggling.

She hit him at that “Oi, big ears, look who’s talking, is that mascara you’re wearing?”

“Alright, alright, point made” He said swatting her away “Anyway, you were saying.”

“Before I was so rudely interrupted.”

“Hmph.”

“Well, how was I supposed to stay at home after you told me what you and Alex were getting up to this morning, you’re so clumsy you can’t even catch a ball, how are you going to catch her when she’s flying towards you?”

He was regretting telling her about it now, he had no doubt she would have great fun teasing him as much as she could in the shoot this morning.

It had seemed a great idea at the time, far more exciting than what had been scripted originally, but he hadn’t really thought it through, nor had he bargained that Alex would be wearing that dress. This really could turn into an embarrassing situation if he wasn’t careful.

There was a call to set so Alex and he wandered over to Steven who was instructing everyone.

“I could kiss you if you had anything to do with these shoes” She said to Steven.

“They really are great” Matt interjected, he hadn’t noticed her holding them until now but for some reason he didn’t like the idea of her kissing Steven. To be fair they were fantastic shoes, she would probably be almost as tall as him in those, which meant that unfortunately that dress would be causing problems even closer to his face. “Imagine you might struggle walking in those though.”

“Well apparently I’ll have you to catch me” She said as the corner of her mouth turned up into a knowing smile.

“Aw man, who told you?” He tried not to let the disappointment that he hadn’t been able to tell her himself come through in his voice.

“Someone from the crew, I had to be fitted for a harness.”

“So what do you think?”

“I love it, it’s very River, although I’m not one for throwing myself at men.”

“Guess you’ll just have to make an exception today.”

“I guess I will.” She said as she playfully elbowed him.

Moffat coughed to get their attention “Let’s save the flirting for the cameras shall we.”

They both giggled like children and put on their best listening attentively faces.

Steven started to talk them through the plans for today and Matt  tried to pay attention, he really did, but he couldn’t keep his eyes off Alex. They had really made an effort to tame her hair and it looked amazing, although, he had to admit, he preferred it in its natural wild state. He was captivated by a loose curl that was bobbing as she nodded along to what Moffat was saying and almost got caught staring by her and swiftly changed his focus to Steven.

“Right, so, Alex you’ll be up first on the wires but hopefully that won’t take too long, the hard bit is going to be getting the shots of you falling into the Tardis.”

“Yeah with Mr.Butter Fingers over there, how many times have you dropped the screwdriver now Matt?” Karen shouted sprawled across several chairs behind them flicking through her script.

“Oi, shut it Kaz…they’re small and fiddly.”

“Whatever you say” She said chuckling to herself.

“Don’t worry Alex, there will be a crash mat as well as this Matt” Steven reassured.

“Well that’s nice to know, but I’m sure Mr.Smith will do just fine” She said smiling at him, he felt all proud at that, how she would have so much faith in him already - misplaced faith though he feared.

Someone called that they were ready for Alex so she went off to get attached to the wires leaving him to go and try and get Karen back. He was not going to let butter fingers catch on.

* * *

The wires really were great fun, if a little scary at first. She noticed Matt staring at her once or twice and asked whether she was having a Marilyn moment, but he was probably more interested in the special effects than he was with her.

Steven was right and it didn’t take long to get the shots they needed, which was good, as the harness was really starting to dig in a bit, and she was looking forward to the next scene.

They gave her a block to stand on so that she could throw herself at Matt and it would look like falling and, thankfully, she could take the heels off for this bit.

“You were fantastic up there” Matt said as he walked over whilst they were setting up the cameras.

“Thanks, it was much harder than you’d think.”

“I bet, but you did it really well, I’d probably have ended up tangled in all the wires and upside down.”

She laughed at the thought of that “I’m sure you would have been fine” She said as she touched his arm. He tensed up for a split second, for some reason it seemed to make him uncomfortable, she would have to restrain herself in future, which would be a bit of a challenge, he was such a magnetic person.

“You ready for the shoot?” She asked, trying to move quickly onwards as if nothing had happened.

“Oh yeah, I couldn’t stop thinking about it all night since Moff said we’d do it, took me ages to get to sleep I was so excited.”

Karen walked past them at that point “Thinking about Alex falling on you at night ‘ey Matty boy.” She hollered. Alex along with several other members of the crew started laughing as his cheeks quickly reddened.

Alex found how flustered he got really quite charming and would have come out with some comment about her thinking about that all night too but thought better of it, considering that it wouldn’t be entirely untrue. Fortunately they were called to set so she wouldn’t have a chance to embarrass herself.

The first take went badly when as she fell onto him she managed to knee him in the crotch. Despite looking like he was in vast amounts of pain he assured her that it was fine and that they should try again.

The next time she was much more careful and it went relatively well until they started giggling hysterically. Her breath caught when he put his hand on the small of her back and then when he stroked her arm, clearly touching her wasn't a problem. It can’t have been on purpose but she didn’t mind, if anything she liked it, and found herself unconsciously roll her hips ever so slightly over his before she got up for the next take.

* * *

Had he just imagined that, he could have sworn he just felt her hips jut against his just before she climbed off him. Oh god he hoped that was real.

What was he thinking, why was he wanting so badly for that to have happened. She was stunning, so what man wouldn’t want Alex Kingston doing that to him, but it was more than that, he wanted her to like him, to want him.

Daisy was great, she was pretty and fun, but it had always been casual with her, he never felt the nervous excitement he felt when he was with Alex or been so unable to stop thinking about her. Like today when she was on the wires, she was having so much fun up there and she had that smile of hers on almost constantly and was laughing all the time, it was so intoxicating and he could hardly take his eyes off her.

It also meant that some good was coming out of Karen’s mocking of him, he was getting to hear a lot of Alex’s laugh.

The next take went well as they managed not to start giggling this time but Steven still wasn’t happy with the take, something about the shot not being quite in frame.

He was distracted by the fact that Alex hadn’t gotten off him yet as she listened to Steven and sat with her hands leaning on his chest. He really hoped she couldn’t feel the pace of his heart quicken.

Without really thinking, he sat up a bit under the pretence of listening to Moff more intently and leaning on one elbow placed his hand on her hip. She didn’t appear to notice and, if she did she, didn’t seem to mind, so he left it there and started to lazily draw circles with his thumb.

When Steven had finished talking to them he had some complaints about the lighting as well so the crew all started to reset for the next take. She still didn’t get off and instead leaned a little closer, giving him an excellent view down her dress, and joked that she hoped she hadn’t hurt him too much on the first take.

If he was honest, it had hurt like hell, but he really didn’t care, not now, not when she was sitting where she was, with her hands on him like this, he didn’t think he could be happier. He couldn’t help but think what this would be like if they were alone, what might happen.

They called for the next take and he begrudgingly took his hand off her hip as she got up and hoped that there was no evidence of his arousal in his trousers. You’d think the thought that she was married would stop his fantasizing but, if anything, it made it more exciting.

The next couple of takes went perfectly so they got to take a break for lunch.

“Well that went well” She said as she helped him up.

“Definitely, although it’s a shame we didn’t get to do more takes, I can’t say that I mind having a woman fall at my feet.”

“Hey, that’s my line.” She protested as she bumped her shoulder into him and he couldn’t help but put an arm round her. He might have imagined it but he thought she leaned into him just a bit.

“Two can play your games Kingston, I think you have some competition.”

“We’ll have to see about that” She said in a particularly sexy voice.

He began to laugh but it was cut short when he looked up to see Daisy sitting next to Karen watching them intently. A wave of panic and guilt came over him and he really hoped she hadn’t been there for the whole take. She barely ever came to set, why today, why this morning, it’s almost like she knew something had changed between them over night.

He realised that Alex was looking at him slightly confused at the sudden stop to their conversation.

“Oh sorry, I just spotted my girlfriend Daisy over there, I should probably go save her from that mad scot” He apologised as he hastily took his arm from around her shoulders.

“Of course, you must introduce me.” She said smiling, but he thought he saw a flicker of disappointment flash across her face at the news.

He was probably just seeing things though, why would Alex care that he had a girlfriend.

Part of him couldn’t help but wish that she did.


	3. Laughter Lines (Bastille)

“So, Alex, how many bruises do you think you’ll have tomorrow?” Karen joked as Matt and her walked up to them.

“Not too many I think, it’s more Matts manhood I’m worried about, I really did hit him pretty hard.”

“Oh I’m sure he’ll be fine, not much manhood to hurt I reckon.”

He had seemed distracted until his manliness was brought into question and quickly proceeded to flick Karen on the nose “Well no one could look manly compared to you now could they Kaz” he said causing her to gasp dramatically.

“Alright you two, don’t make me send you to Steven” Alex teased as she stepped in between them to stop their bickering.

The girl sitting next to Karen who must have been Daisy hadn’t said anything yet. She had dark hair and was attractive, slim and actually looked like a pretty cool person, not to mention she was about 20 years younger than Alex, which surprisingly made her feel a little dispirited.

Matt went over to her and kissed her on the cheek “Hey Daise, what a nice surprise, didn’t think you’d come onto set today.”

“Yeah well I overheard you telling Karen about the scenes you were shooting today and they sounded, interesting, and I didn’t have anything on so I figured I would drop by.”

“Oh cool, well filming has been funner than usual this morning.”

Karen did an exaggerated wink at Alex when he said that, she hoped Daisy hadn’t seen it, she seemed to be suspicious enough as it was.

“So Matt, are you going to introduce me to your friends?”

“Oh right, yeah, well you must know Karen now and this is Al” He was cut short by Daisy springing to her feet.

“Alex Kingston, I know, who wouldn’t know?” She said as she offered her hand for Alex to shake “It’s great to meet you, I hate to say it but I’m a pretty big fan.”

That was not what Alex had been expecting, the complete opposite in fact. She thought Daisy either wouldn’t care who she was or would be angry at having someone falling, quite literally, all over her boyfriend.

“Oh, well thank you” She said taking her hand “It’s nice to meet you too.”

* * *

Daisy and Alex continued to talk throughout lunch about her previous work. Matt really hadn’t seen Daisy as animated as this in a long while, she never really got excited about anything.

He had to admit that he was feeling kind of jealous; although strangely not that he couldn’t make Daisy light up any more like this, but that he couldn’t talk to Alex.

He had tensed up when Daisy had said she overheard his idea, somehow it made it sound like he was up to something which, of course, he wasn’t. It was just a change to the script, there were no ulterior motives, how could there be, he had a girlfriend and Alex, well, Alex was married.

He wondered over to the coffee table to get a drink, feeling a bit deflated after remembering that.

Karen joined him and seemed to pick up on his mood, as much as he hated giving her compliments, that girl was pretty sharp.

“What’s up floppy hair?”

“Are the names ever going to end?”

“I doubt it, you’re far too much fun to wind up, anyway don’t change the subject, why do you look so glum all of a sudden?”

“I’m just tired is all, it’s been a long morning.”

She raised her eyebrow at that, clearly sceptical. “I thought you’d be pleased that Daisy was here, you’re always complaining about how you never see her any more and how she’s always too busy to spend time with you.”

“Yeah I am pleased…not that it really seems like she came to see me.”

“I wouldn’t take it personally, I mean who wouldn’t want to talk to Alex, I had a hard enough time restraining myself yesterday, she’s just exciting to be around.”

“I guess I know what you mean” He said, knowing exactly what she meant, he couldn’t seem to stop thinking about her.

They wandered back to join the others to hear Alex recalling some tales from filming Moll.

“Well let’s just say that some of them may have had a bit of a, shall we say, reaction, when we were filming THOSE scenes” She said laughing her obscenely sexy laugh. He couldn’t help but think of how it had been today lying under her while she straddled him and felt a sudden redness rush to his cheeks.

“What scenes?” Karen asked

“Guessing you haven’t seen Moll Flanders then?” Said Daisy.

“I’m afraid I’ve not.”

“Ah, well you’re missing out, it’s a great film.”

Boy was it; he knew exactly how good it was having watched it half a dozen times.

“And by that she means it’s got 17 sex scenes” Joked Alex.

“Oh Alex, I’ve definitely got to watch it now, have you seen it Matt?”

“Yeah, I have, but it was a while back” He lied, considering he’d watched a bit last night when he was too excited to sleep.

“Well we should all watch it together then” Suggested Karen.

“Oh god no, it would be far too embarrassing” Complained Alex.

“Please Alex! What could be embarrassing about it? It’ll be fun, we can watch it before we go out on Saturday.”

“What’s happening on Saturday?” asked Daisy.

“Us and some of the crew are going out and meeting the new guy Darvill, you should come.”

“Both of you should come.” Matt said before he’d had a chance to think it through. Even though Daisy didn’t seem suspicious he didn’t want to come across too eager. Fortunately she didn’t seem to notice and joined in his enthusiasm that Alex should come too.

“I thought we were filming on the beach this weekend?”

“We were, but Moff just told me we’re going to have to wait until Monday due to some pretty bad weather, so anyway, please say you’ll come.”

“I don’t know, I don’t really do that sort of thing any more, I wouldn’t want to get in your way or anything.”

“Nonsense.” protested Karen “It’s decided, you’re coming, are you up for the film as well?”

“I suppose I am, if you’re going to watch it anyway, but can we do it on Sunday instead?”

“Yay! Of course, sounds like a great hangover cure.” exclaimed Karen.

Matt couldn’t help but smile at the news, he’d get to see Alex this weekend, on not one day but two, he really shouldn’t be so happy about it but everyone else seemed to be so he blended in nicely.

“How about you Daisy?”

“Sounds fun, it will be good to spend some time with everyone before I go back to London.”

“Oh are you not here long?” asked Karen

“No, I head back on Monday, got quite a few jobs on over the next couple of months.”

“That’s a shame, but yeah, Saturday night, this is gonna be so much fun!” Karen squealed.

There was a call for them to go to set then so Daisy said she should probably go and bid them all goodbye. For some reason he felt relieved, maybe because this afternoons shoot involved quite a bit of River being flirtatious in the Tardis, or maybe it was that he had Alex back to himself again.

* * *

The afternoons scenes had gone well, Matt and her already worked so well together they often only needed a couple of takes to get what they needed meaning that the day ended all to quickly for her as she wasn’t needed for the rest of the scenes.

She made her way to her trailer to change out of the dress, which she would have happily taken home, but the girls in wardrobe insisted that they have it back, and get ready to head back to her flat.

She was half way through taking it off when there was a knock on her door.

“Who is it?”

A smile came to her face when the voice that replied belonged to Matt.

“It’s me, can I come in?”

“Of course” She called back without really thinking about the fact her zip was halfway down her back having gotten stuck.

He bounced up the steps and managed to hit his head on the ceiling, but in his enthusiasm he didn’t seem to notice.

“Hey, there was a change to the script and…” He cut himself off when he realised what she had been doing and quickly covered his eyes.

“Oh god sorry I thought you said to come in” He flustered.

“It’s fine Matt, if anything I could use your help, the zip seems to have jammed, would you mind trying to fix it?”

When his hand fell from his eyes he looked shocked for a second before a large smile took its place.

“Knew you’d ask me to get you out of your clothes sooner or later” He joked as he walked up behind her.

“Oh Mr.Smith, don’t start thinking that you’re anything more than a convenient pair of hands.”

“My hands can be far more than convenient.” He said, lowering his voice as he placed one firmly on her back whilst the other tugged at the zip and slowly pulled it down her back. She couldn’t help but let a shiver run up her spine.

“Well I’ll have to see that to believe it.”

“Oh, you wish” He said, still lingering behind her, his breath making her neck tingle as he spoke.

She wanted to turn around and pull him close and show him just how much she wished that but she managed to restrain herself.

What was happing to her? She was married, and he was so young, and had a beautiful girlfriend, this was all just a bit of fun to him. It had been to her too the first couple of times they flirted, but for her it had become something more than that, she was falling for him.

The dress started to slip now that it was undone but she caught it just in time, bringing her back to reality.

“Thank you.” she said as she turned to face him, taking a step back “The costume department would have probably had my head if I’d torn it trying to take it off.”

He ran a hand through his hair like he always did when he was nervous, there was flash of disappointment on his face, or was she just seeing what she wanted to, but it swiftly turned into his adorable lopsided smile, his hair falling into his face “No worries, it was my pleasure.”

“So what were you saying when you came in?”

He seemed confused for a second but quickly remembered “Oh yeah, there’s been some script changes so Steven wanted to get it to you before you went home.”

“And he couldn’t find a member of the crew to do it could he?”

His cheeks went a little red but he wasn’t caught out “Top secret information, so he couldn’t trust anyone other than me.”

“Ah I see, of course, a doctor and a special agent, isn’t River a lucky girl” She said and they both started to laugh.

“Anyway, I better get going, unless you need more help getting undressed that is?”

She swatted him “Oh you naughty boy, go on, you best get back to set or people might start wondering why you’ve been gone so long.”

“Alright, see you on Saturday” He said, and then to her surprise, he leaned in and kissed her on the cheek, lingering just a fraction too long, and then strode out the door with a wave.

If the fact that her heart was racing and that she seemed to have forgotten to breath was any indication, she was in a lot of trouble.


	4. Love is Blindness (Jack White)

When he’d offered to take the script to Alex he thought he’d, at most, get to talk to her alone for a minute or two, he never expected that.

Standing there behind her with his hands on her back, it was all he could do not to take the dress off her shoulders and start kissing her neck. He had felt her perfect curls tickle his nose as he talked and he could smell her, a strong mint and something he could only describe as lust.

All evening he couldn’t stop thinking about what had happened. What did she think of him? Was it all just a joke to her? Did he have feelings for her?

Oh god he did didn’t he, how couldn’t he, she was perfect, no, she was Alex. What was he going to do? She was married and, even if she wasn’t, she wouldn’t want him would she, and of course there was Daisy. He cared about her, but his feelings towards her seemed like nothing now compared to what he was feeling for Alex.

He messed up a couple of scenes he was so distracted and they had to stay late. He apologised profusely to everyone but he was pretty glad about it really because it meant that when he got home Daisy would be asleep and he wouldn’t have to face her.

Now it would feel wrong, like he couldn’t want anyone other than Alex, but also he felt guilty, guilty that he didn’t love Daisy anymore, he hadn’t for a long time really but he always thought his feelings would come back. Now he knew that was impossible.

He would have to do something about it but the question was when. Sunday seemed best, she was leaving for London on Monday anyway and this would give them both a chance to get over it.

He didn’t know what he would say, ‘I don’t love you any more’ seemed so harsh even though it was the truth, maybe something about them both changing and drifting apart which was sort of true as well. She always seemed bored around him these days and was less and less interested in him when it came to sex too, he’d never realised it before but maybe this had been a long time coming.

He felt so drained and tired when he got into bed that he went straight to sleep, which was probably a good thing or else he’d have spent the whole night thinking about Alex.

Not that he minded dreaming about her.

* * *

That evening when she got back to her flat and into bed she was restless even though she’d been up since four.

She couldn’t stop thinking about Matt.

What had happened in her trailer kept replaying in her head and an ache began to build between her legs.

It had been so long since she had been in the same bed with Ralph, let alone since they’d slept together. She subconsciously began to slide her hand down her body slipping into her shorts and she began to softly stroke her sex.

She was surprised to find herself wet and slipped two fingers inside herself causing her to gasp at the welcome intrusion. She pressed the ball of her hand into her clit and started an even rhythm.

She imagined Matt unzipping her dress but not stopping there. He kissed down her neck and her back, spinning her round as the dress dropped to the floor and taking a nipple in his mouth while his knee nudged her legs apart. Her hand started to pick up the pace as her fantasy continued, and she could feel that she was close to the edge. She moved her fingers deeper and faster and suddenly felt her walls clamp around them and her body shudder as her orgasm overcame her.

After a couple of minutes she snapped out of her post orgasmic daze and remembered just who’d caused it to happen.

It had only been two days but she already seemed to have developed pretty strong feelings for him.

She knew it was ridiculous, he was twenty years younger than her, she was married, well technically, and she was sure it was one sided, what could he possibly see in her.

She would have to just stop, that was the only way…or was it.

He already flirted with her all the time and they got on so well, she could just enjoy it while it lasted and then go back to London and forget about him.

Oh, who was she kidding, if she let herself feel anything it would probably end up hurting her, she would just have to keep reminding herself about Ralph and Daisy, those two were probably the only thing stopping her from completely falling head over heels for him.

Yes, Ralph and Daisy, she was not the sort of woman to cheat on someone, even if it was all just in her mind, so that was that.

As she eventually drifted off to sleep she decided she would try to just be his friend, how hard could it be?

She woke in the morning to her phone receiving a text.

‘ _Hope you’re not too sore this morning Kingston ;)_ ’ she read and a smile crept onto her face even though he’d reminded her of her harness bruises.

This wasn’t going to be as easy as she’d hoped.

* * *

He got to set to find her already there dressed in military attire holding handcuffs and he couldn’t help but feel turned on.

She was taking to someone, he couldn’t tell who from behind but they were standing far too close for his liking and she was laughing at something they’d said, he couldn’t help but feel a little jealous.

The unknown man put a hand on her arm and seemingly without thinking Matt found himself calling out Alex’s name and marching towards them.

“Good morning Kingston” He said cheerily swinging his arm round her shoulder as he stole her coffee.

“You seem rather happy this morning” She said as she took her drink back, but made no move to remove herself from his arm and Matt couldn’t help but feel happy about that.

“Well, who wouldn’t be on their first day filming with the most fearsome creatures in all the universe?”

“I have to admit I’m more scared than excited, I got the fright of my life this morning when I went to make up and bumped straight into one when I opened the door. “

“Well don’t worry, your husband will protect you” He hugged her a little tighter when he said that, finding that he really did want to protect her from anyone who might try and hurt her.

“Who says you’re my husband?”

“I’m making an educated guess.”

“Well we’ll have to see about that, Steven does like to throw a few curve balls into the plot so you never know.”

Their conversation was abruptly cut short when a girl from the hair department appeared and insisted that Alex got hers fixed before the take so off they went leaving Matt with the man who he had forgotten existed up until now.

He turned to see Iain Glen watching him intently.

Skipping the courtesies he came straight out with “You two seem to get on well.” causing a panicked look to appear on Matt's face. Was the fact that he was smitten with her already that obvious?

“I..um” He flustered.

Iain began to laugh “Don’t look so worried lad, she’s almost impossible not to get along with.” Matt felt relieved, of course that’s what he meant, although he didn’t like being called lad, it made him feel young, far too young and silly for Alex anyway.

“I’m Matt by the way, nice to meet you” He said trying to change the subject.

“I guessed, nice to meet you too. Alex was just telling me what a great job you’ve been doing.” That made him fill with happiness, Alex thought he was great, well his acting anyway and that was more than good enough for him.

“Well I hope I don’t disappoint you today.”

“I’m sure you won’t, I’ve only been hearing good things.” Said Iain.

“Well the whole crew and the script are just fantastic, so it’s pretty hard to do a bad job.”

“That’s true, you’ve got a great cast too , especially Alex, there’s just something about her isn’t there.”

“Yeah she’s a great actor” He agreed, trying to hide the jealousy that had risen in him once again. Iain was a good looking man, not to mention a very similar age to Alex, and although married himself he seemed far too interested in Alex for Matt's liking.

He was probably over reacting, but even though she wasn’t his, and probably never would be, he felt very protective of her.

Thankfully they were called to set then and Matt didn’t have to listen to how great Iain thought Alex was any more.

* * *

They were shooting in caves that had been made on set today and it was pretty dark, full of angels, and Alex had to admit that she found it all rather exhilarating.

She was enjoying filming with Iain, although she noticed that Matt always looked a bit grumpy or whisked her away to show her something whenever she spoke to him, or was it just a coincidence.

The mornings filming all went quickly so they were allowed a whole hour for lunch which was very out of the ordinary for Who.

Once they had all finished their sandwiches they still had 45 minutes to kill and, instead of running lines, Karen suggested they all play a bit of hide and seek on set with all the caves and statues.

After a lot of pleading from Karen and Matt she was persuaded to play, and even Iain said he’d join in, seemingly to Matt's disappointment.

Karen drew seeker first and quickly started to count to the agreed 100 seconds and everybody ran off.

She considered hiding behind one of the angel statues but thought it might be a bit obvious and decided to go for the Tardis on the edge of set.

She’d been in there for a half a minute or so when the door was vigorously swung open and she thought she’d been found but, to her surprise, Matt leaped in and quietly shut the door.

“Oi, this is my spot” she protested.

“My Tardis” He retorted “Karen is on her way.”

It was a tight fit now that Matt was in here since the crew had decided to store some spare statues in there, meaning they were pressed together quite tightly side by side.

She was about to speak when Matt turned to face her and covered her mouth. “She’s outside" He whispered, pointing to the door where you could hear footsteps.

He dropped his hand from her face and rested it on her shoulder and she found herself putting her own on his waist while they held their breath together as the footsteps got closer.

They both leaned together as she stopped outside the Tardis and let out their breath in unison as she moved on.

It was then that she realised how closely they were pressed up against each other, their faces just inches apart.

She looked up to find him staring down at her, his eyes dark, pupils blown wide, and an ache start to grow between her legs, memories of last night flooding back to her. She couldn’t help but hold him a bit tighter as they both moved their faces a little closer together, their eyes locked.

Suddenly, she was brought back to reality when she heard Karen shout “Found you.” and then she felt panic, what would Karen think if she found her and Matt like this.

They quickly broke apart but then heard Iain complain “Dam,n I’m always the first one to go” and they both sighed in relief.

“That was a close call.” Matt whispered, although she didn’t know if he was talking about the game or what had almost just happened between them.

She nodded in agreement seemingly unable to think of something to say that wouldn't give away how she was feeling.

Her plan to see him as a friend was failing fast, her heart was racing and it was taking all her will power not to push him against the wall and claim his mouth.

Suddenly the door opened and Karen beamed when she saw them both “Yes! Two in one, and thank god they managed to get their clothes back on in time” She joked, causing Matt to go as red as a tomato.

“Anyone up for round two?” She asked. “I think I’ll skip the next one.” said Alex deciding that hiding in small dark places when Matt was around was probably not a good idea any more.

Clearly her infatuation was far worse than she thought.


	5. Eavesdrop (The Civil Wars)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The chapter title matching the plot for this was totally coincidental, funny how stuff works like that.

After what had happened yesterday, Alex decided she would try not to spend too much, if any, time alone with Matt.

That, hopefully, wouldn’t be too hard today as they were filming in the caves again with lots of the cast and they wouldn’t really have the chance to get into any…situations.

Everything was going smoothly until lunch came and Karen went out for a cigarette, leaving Alex by herself with a vacant seat next to her.

A seat which was swiftly filled by Matt.

He sat far too close with his leg touching hers, although she knew this was exactly what she was trying to avoid she couldn’t quite bring herself to move hers away.

“Hello Kingston.” He said smiling.

“Hello Mr.Smith.”

“Haven’t had the chance to talk to you all morning.”

“Well, we’ve been very busy darling.”

“Oh, I see how it is, too busy to talk to your time lord husband.” He joked.

She found it helped when they talked as if they were the Doctor and River, it made her feelings seem less real.

“Well I don’t get much chance do I now, I'm locked up most of the time, leaves little opportunity for conversation.” She teased.

“Guess I’ll just have to visit you in Stormcage sometime…even if it does only have one bed.”

“Only if you bring some handcuffs, I am a prisoner after all.” She said biting her lip, seemingly unable to stop herself from flirting with the man.

“Oh you dirty girl” He said, leaning in a bit and putting his hand on her thigh.

The sensation sent sparks though her, particularly to the spot between her legs.

“You know, we really should have River in more episodes, it’s much more fun when you’re around.” Matt said.

“Well, you never know, she might be back.” Alex suggested, trying to sound casual about it.

He looked excited at that and gripped her leg a little tighter. “Really?! Are you going to be back next series?”

“Spoilers.” She said and she couldn’t help but feel a little smug at the frustration on his face.

They both jumped when they heard an excited squeal from behind, Alex could never understand how it managed to sound Scottish but it did, which signalled Karen’s swift return as the word ‘spoilers’ was mentione. She did seem to like trying to pry secrets out of Alex.

Matt's hand twitched as if he was having an internal battle about removing it or not but Alex made the decision for him and excused herself before Karen could interrogate her.

It wouldn’t be good if Karen started to get the wrong end of the stick about the two of them anyway, she’d be right of course, as far as Alex’s feelings were concerned anyway, but it would just make things worse if she had to admit them to someone.

The afternoons filming went well, less so her avoidance of Matt, he couldn’t seem to stop bumping into her or brushing her hand while they were running about through the caves. It was silly really but wherever he touched her left a tingling sensation and made her light up a little inside.

She always felt a bit down when she returned to her flat after filming, after a day filled with talking and laughter it felt so quiet and empty when she was alone again.

Once she was back she had some supper, took a shower and went to check her email.

There were a couple from her agent and her parents and one from her sister Nicola.

She opened the one from Nicola and all the happiness she had felt today suddenly drained from her.

' _Can’t believe Ralph is going to be in the next Bond film! How did you keep that one a secret? Give him my congratulations.'_

The first thing she felt was rage.

He didn’t tell her. She was his wife and he didn’t tell her.

She couldn’t help but hear Matt’s words from earlier echo in her head. _"Too busy to talk to your husband."_

She would have found out in the paper if it weren’t for her sister.

Alex knew things had been going downhill with them lately but this was something else. He’d been in a lot of films but this was pretty big and he hadn’t even mentioned that he’d had an audition; it was like she wasn’t even important enough to him anymore to tell her about his life.

She couldn’t help but wonder what other things he hadn’t told her about.

Alex didn’t want to start feeling sad for herself, and wanted to do this while she still had anger in her, so, she rummaged around in her bag and dialled the bastard’s number.

* * *

He’d barely been able to contain himself today when he spoke with Alex at lunch. The way she let him lean on her and put his hand on her leg and flirt with her. Not to mention yesterday in the Tardis, he'd barely been able to stop himself from kissing her. It was both fantastic and heart-breaking at the same time.

The rest of the day he’d been drawn to her, he knew she didn’t feel the same way, but he just wanted to be near her, to see her smiling.

He couldn’t help but remember that she was staying in the flat next door, they were literally separated by a single wall…and her marriage, and it was taking all his restraint not to go over there and, he didn’t know, see her, talk to her, smile at her, anything where she was with him.

Daisy was out with friends, so he couldn’t distract himself by talking to her, so he put on the TV but, as per usual, there was nothing on, so he tried to find his ipod. He looked around for a while before remembering that he had leant it to Kaz.

She was on this floor as well so he went out in the corridor and headed towards her door but he was stopped in his tracks when he heard a raised voice coming from Alex’s flat.

He froze and edged closer to the door so that he could hear.

She sounded angry. Why would she be angry? Who was she talking to?

He couldn’t hear everything but he soon worked out that it was Ralph and that he’d kept something important from her.

It didn’t last long and he heard her hang up so he started to walk away but managed to trip over his own feet and bang into her door.

He looked up from the floor to see Alex looking down at him with confused look on her face.

“Would you believe me if I said a Dalek tripped me up?”

She smiled, but you could still see the sadness through it, she was so strong, it was one of the things that made him like her so much.

“Could have been those annoying lace untying aliens” She suggested, pointing at the tangled mess by his feet.

“Could be.” He said as he got up.

He only noticed now that he was upright that her eyes were red and teary, and he felt a pain in his chest as all he wanted to do was hold her and stop her from feeling sad.

“Alex are you ok?” He blurted out.

She shook her head and the tears began to flow down her cheeks.

Without a second thought he walked into her flat, shut the door, took her into his arms and held her.

She buried her head into his shoulder and wrapped her arms around him and began to cry.

Matt didn’t say anything for a while, he just held on to her tighter and stroked her back until she started to calm down.

“Oh god, sorry about this.” She said through her tears.

“Don’t apologise Alex, I’m here for you, that’s what friends are for.”

It physically hurt him that she felt to need to say sorry, like she wasn’t worth his effort. It was something he was going to change.

He let go of her and, taking her hand, led her over to the couch and sat her down.

“Now, would you like some tea?” He asked.

She smiled and nodded, her cheeks still wet.

He quickly made her a cup and handed it to her as he sat down next to her.

While she sipped her tea he looked around her flat, it was much neater than his and it smelled like her. There were several books on table and a vase of white roses, he would have to remember that she liked those.

After a minute or two she stopped crying and set down her mug.

“Knew the tea would work, it’s the best remedy my mum always says.”

“Well your mum's a smart woman, thank you Matt, I really appreciate it.”

“It was nothing” He said, running a hand through his hair, hesitating a bit. “Do you mind if I ask what’s wrong?”

He didn’t want to upset her but he wanted to fix it, to make her happy again.

“Things with Ralph, it feels like it’s breaking apart.” She said, another tear running down her face.

He couldn’t help but put his arm around her shoulders, as if he might be able to protect her from her pain, and was surprised when she tucked up her legs and leaned into him, like she trusted him.

“I’m sure you don’t want to hear about it.” She started but he cut her off.

“I do Alex, I care that you’re upset and I want to hear about it. I want to help you.”

He hoped it had come across like friendly concern instead of the burning urge to comfort her that he was feeling, but she didn’t seem to notice, and started to tell him what was wrong.

She told him about how Ralph and she never saw each other, how they barely talked any more, and that she felt like he didn’t care or want her around these days.

“I just sort of figured it was inevitable before, that this is what happens when two people are so busy with work, but this just woke me up to how bad it’s become.”

He already disliked Ralph, on account that he was married to Alex, but now he despised him. Anyone who made Alex feel like this was worth nothing, less than nothing, and he hated him for it.

“Well clearly he's an idiot" Matt said, pleased when he made her laugh a little.

"Very possibly." She agreed. "I just can't quite believe that it's come to this, I don't even feel like he's my friend any more, let alone my husband."

"I'm sure you can work things out." He said, although part of him hoped it didn't. "Maybe he'll come to his senses and apologise."

"Not very likely, Ralph doesn't do apologies well, he's far too proud."

Matt found himself hating Ralph more and more every minute.

They sat quietly for a while, Matt stroking Alex's shoulder as she finished her tea.

"Alex." he said breaking the silence.

She peered up from her mug on the table which she'd been frowning at for the last couple of minutes.

"He really doesn't deserve you."

She looked like she was going to protest but she changed her mind. 

"Thanks Matt." She said smiling "For everything."

They sat together in silence for the rest of the evening until he felt himself start to yawn.

He was about to ask Alex if she wanted him to go but when he looked down he saw her eyes were shut and her breathing even and steady, her arm draped around his waist.

He thought about slipping out from under her and going back to his flat, but Daisy was staying with her friend anyway tonight, and this moment was so perfect nothing could tear him away.

He had Alex safe and sound in his arms.

He moved some curls out of her eyes and kissed her on the forehead.

“Goodnight Kingston” He whispered.

The last thing he saw before his eyes fluttered shut was Alex's smile as they held each other a little tighter.


	6. Into the Past (Nero)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry its such a short chapter but I've got a lot of uni deadlines coming up this week.  
> Don't worry though, the next one will hopefully more than make up for the lack of length in this one.

She woke that morning on the sofa to find a blanket over her, a steaming cup of coffee on the table and a note that she couldn’t help but smile at.

‘ _Had to go in early for filming, hope you feel better this morning and that the alarm I set for you worked, see you on set, I’m going to need your help to keep those angels away. Matt. X’_

She stretched as she got up, her neck ached from sleeping on Matt’s shoulder but she didn’t really care, not when she felt so happy despite what had happened with Ralph.

Oh yes, Ralph, she’d almost forgotten.

Matt had helped her so much last night, he’d held her and made her feel safe and listened to her. He had surprised her so much when he crashed into her door and she didn’t know quite how much she needed, and wanted, him there until he was striding through her door and taking her into his arms. The last thing she remembered from it was falling asleep nestled against him and thinking that it didn’t feel like an infatuation anymore, it just felt right.

Her heart began to swell at the thought but her conversation with Ralph was starting to replay in her mind and the happiness she had been feeling suddenly turned into a lump in her throat and she had to try and hold back the tears that she could feel forming in her eyes. Matt wasn’t here to hold her this time.

She busied herself with showering and running her lines, she knew she would be alright once she was on set and she had a job to do. She always had been good at hiding her emotions.

She was glad that it took the girls a long time to do her hair this morning meaning that she wouldn’t have much time to hang around on set. As much as she appreciated what Matt had done for her and how much she cared about him something just felt wrong and she couldn’t quite pin point what it was.

She felt guilty, just a little, because married women shouldn’t fall asleep in the arms of another man, especially a man who is in a relationship. That wasn’t it though; Ralph had told her that they barely had a marriage any more anyway so any guilt she felt was probably to do with Daisy.

Deep down she knew what it really was and it broke her heart. The knowledge that she and Matt would never be with each other and that she would never be able to show him how much she cared.

Even if she wasn’t married to Ralph what could Matt possibly see in her other than friendship? He was brilliant, even with his long uncoordinated limbs and his big chin and floppy hair. The thought of him made her light up inside, everything about him made her smile and before she’d met him she hadn’t smiled, not truly, in a very long time. 

\---

You would never know what had happened to Alex from how she was on set the next day. She was smiling and laughing but when she thought no one was looking she let her guard slip just a bit and you could see sadness flicker across her face. Every time he saw it he wanted to go and hold her like he had before, to make all the pain go away but he couldn’t, not on set and it had practically killed him.

Today was Saturday and that meant that he would get to go out with Alex and he could barely contain himself.

He decided he would try and cheer her up and went to get some more of those white roses for her. He’d told daisy that he’d destroyed her old ones by knocking them off the table when he went to borrow some milk; it wasn’t like he could really tell her the truth, besides she'd actually insisted that he put her name on the flowers too in order to apologise for her clumsy boyfriend.

He bounded up to her flat and knocked enthusiastically. The door opened and the smile fell from his face and he felt like someone had just hit him in the chest with a baseball bat.

It wasn’t Alex who came to open the door, it was Ralph.

What the fuck was that bastard doing here.

“Can I help you?” asked Ralph in one of the most patronising tones Matt had ever heard.

He was about to shout at him, tell him that he could help him by fucking off and that he was an utter moron for upsetting Alex but he didn’t get the chance.

“Oh hello sweetie, thought we weren’t leaving for another hour?” said Alex as she appeared next to ralph, the term of endearment calming him considerably. 

 “We are, I um, just came to give you these” he said as he handed the flowers to her, quickly trying to think of a reason that wouldn’t involve him giving away what had happened the other night and cause her further trouble with Ralph, as much as he wanted to.

“You looked a bit down yesterday so Daisy and I thought they might cheer you up, she says she can't wait for tonight by the way.”

“Thank you Matthew, they’re lovely, how did you know that they’re my favourite”

“Lucky guess” said Matt as he ran his hand through his hair, unable to stop himself from glancing at Ralph. His eyes were cold but Matt couldn’t deny that he was a handsome man, he looked confident and sophisticated and Matt couldn’t help but feel a little inferior, how was he ever going to compare to that.

“Oh yes, Ralph this is Matt, he’s the new Doctor and Matt this is my husband Ralph” said Alex. She had a smile on her face but he saw a flash of something in her eyes when she said the word husband, he could only describe it as heartbreak and he could feel the urge to punch Ralph right in the face start to build within him.

“Nice to meet you.” said Ralph offering his hand which Matt begrudgingly took.

“Same” said Matt trying to sound as unenthusiastic as possible. “What brings you to Cardiff?”

“I had some things I wanted to talk to Alex about; I have to admit that I had some apologising to do”.

Matt felt conflicted. On one hand it was good that Ralph seemed to care enough to travel all the way to Cardiff to apologize and it would probably make Alex happier. On the other he felt suspicion. From what Alex had said about what Ralph was like this all sounded very odd, like he was over compensating for something, not to mention that it decreased the already infinitely small chance that Matt would ever be able to be with Alex.

“Oh right, are you going to come out with us all tonight?” he asked, dreading the answer.

“Unfortunately not, I have to get back to London as I’ve got filming tomorrow”

“That’s a shame.” Matt said as he tried very hard to stop himself from smiling. “Right well I better go get ready, see you in a bit.”

“Bye Matt and thanks again for the flowers” Alex called as he walked away.

Once he heard the door close he stopped and slumped against the wall.

Although Ralph wasn't staying long it still made him feel fairly distraught. Seeing him there with Alex made him seem real for the first time and suddenly things seemed so hopeless for him. He'd always assumed that things were bad in her marriage and that one day he might get his chance but now that looked impossible.

How was he ever going to get through this.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	7. Wanderlust - Edit (Polly Scattergood)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry its been so long for this chapter, had many essays to do and a 4000 word lab report on sexual selection due, if only it were as fun to write as Mattex.  
> Hope you enjoy this chapter as much as I enjoyed writing it.  
> Any feedback would be really welcome, its my first time writing and I could use all the critique I can get :)

He got to the club first with Daisy and Karen, Alex got stuck in traffic taking Ralph to the station. Yet another way he was ruining Matt’s life.

It was a nice place, definitely one of Cardiff’s more up-market clubs, the music was loud and everyone was already drinking pretty heavily. He’d met the new guy Arthur who seemed great and was now being forced to dance by a slightly, OK very, tipsy Karen.

Despite the place being mostly filled with crew from Who he couldn’t seem to find the energy to talk or dance with anyone, he just kept glancing at the door, hoping she would be walking through it.

After narrowly escaping dancing to some awful pop song with everyone he headed over to the bar. He was about to order when someone took the words right out of his mouth.

“Two whiskeys, forget the rocks” said a low voice from behind a mass of golden curls.

His face broke into a wide smile as he realised that Alex had finally arrived, accompanied by a rather stunning black dress and her converse.

“How did you know I needed this?” he asked.

“How did you know both of them weren’t for me” she replied and he started to laugh before he noticed how sad she looked.

“Are you alright Alex? Did something happen with Ralph?”

“I’ll be fine, we just had a bit of an argument on the way to the station, it’s nothing but thanks for asking, you have no idea how nice it is to have someone to talk about this with, someone who seems to care.”

There it was again, her thinking she wasn’t worth anyone’s time, and yet again he had to fight the urge to hold her close and tell her how much she mattered, how much he truly cared.

“Hey you know I’ll always be here for you Alex, you can always count on me.”

She smiled at that, her perfect smile.

“I know what will cheer you up, dancing.”

He expected her to say no but instead she downed her drink, god it was sexy, she didn’t seem to even flinch as it went down.

“Alright then, let’s do it” she said.

He quickly followed her example and downed the whiskey, shuddering slightly as it burned its way through his throat, took her hand and led her onto the dance floor where they joined Karen, Darvill and Daisy.

He was pressed up next to Alex in the middle of the crowd and it was like the music wasn’t even there. All he could focus on was every time Alex touched him as they moved, the tingle he felt when her curls brushed against his arm and neck, the way she smiled as she danced and swayed her glorious hips. It was all he could do not to close the gap between them and dance with her, with his hands on her waist, in her hair, his lips against hers. He felt his trousers start to grow tight at the thought and quickly tried to distract himself.

He’d never thought that dancing with Alex would be one of the best and worst ideas he’d ever had.

\---

She’d been feeling pretty down after having Ralph here, when he’d showed up at her door she felt like her little place of happiness had been discovered. He’d apologised and they’d talked about their relationship and how they could try and fix things, not that they came to any conclusions. She had almost been happy about his visit until he’d mentioned that she over reacted about the Skyfall job and that there were ‘lots of other things I don’t tell you about’ on their way to the station. He’d made it sound like a joke but something about it sounded wrong and she couldn’t help but wonder, what is it he isn’t telling me?

She was glad she’d decided to still come out though, Matt had made her feel better and the dancing was surprisingly fun.

Karen and a man she assumed was the new guy Arthur had clearly drunk far too much and looked like they were having a great time, particularly Karen who had several very handsome men vying for her attention.

There were a lot of people on the dance floor so they were all squashed together making it quite difficult to dance, not to mention avoid touching your fellow actors, Matt especially. She couldn’t exactly help it when they were all in such close proximity and he didn’t seem to be moving away, he probably didn’t even notice her.

“Would you like a drink?” she heard Daisy ask over the music.

Instead of trying to shout she shook her head, it was pretty damn loud in here that was for sure.

Now that Daisy was gone Matt looked a bit lost and flustered with no one to dance with and gestured towards the bathroom before scampering off up the stairs.

After a minute or so Daisy returned looking very happy, clearly Karen and Arthur weren’t the only ones drinking tonight.

They were actually playing pretty good songs so she managed to lose herself in the music for a while and forget about Ralph.  She was dancing with Daisy and was surprisingly really enjoying her company, she really was a nice girl she thought as she caught her eye and they smiled at each other. She shut her eyes as a particularly nice beat started to play and suddenly felt  a hands caressing her cheeks and someone’s lips on her own.

Her eyes flew open to find Daisy, Matt’s Daisy, kissing her.

\---

He came out of the bathroom and froze, his eyes fixed on what he saw.

Daisy had just reached out to Alex and kissed her. Oddly his first thought was jealousy that someone else was kissing Alex but that quickly changed to confusion and just a little bit of pain.

Alex stood still and within seconds pulled away with a look of shock on her face, similar to what he imagined was on his at that very moment.

Before he knew it he was striding towards them, pushing people aside, his mind racing with questions. What had just happened? Was it a drunken kiss? A dare?

He finally reached them and both turned to face him as he approached, Alex’s face looking surprised and Daisy’s full of guilt.

His face softened, he realised he probably looked angry. He gestured for them to follow him outside so that he could hear the whole story. There was probably a very good explanation for this. Well he hoped there was.

The door banged shut and he turned to face them in the much quieter outside, their warm breath visible in the crisp air.  

He was about to open his mouth to speak when Daisy cut him off, his words catching in his throat.

“It’s all my fault” she blurted out. “It has nothing to do with Alex, well it does, but it’s not her fault, oh god, I should have told you earlier.”

“Told me what?” he asked, completely clueless as to what was going on.

She sighed heavily; clearly whatever it was had been weighing on her mind a lot lately.

“I’ve been feeling it for a while now, well I’ve always felt it, and I thought it would pass but recently something’s just ignited in me and well…Matt, I’m gay.”

His jaw literally dropped, of all the things he thought she would say, that was not one of them.

“But, you, and, hang on, Alex?” he spluttered out.

“Oh yeah Alex, god you’re stunning, I’m sorry about kissing you, I just couldn’t stop myself, there’s just something about you, I’m sorry to both of you, I feel so guilty.” She said as her lip started to quiver, she was starting to get pretty upset.

Simultaneously Alex and he put an arm around her, their protective natures kicking in.

“It’s ok sweetie” Alex cooed “I don’t mind, if anything I’ll take it as a compliment, I’m flattered that someone as wonderful as you wanted to kiss me, you’re a lovely girl although I’m afraid I’m married, but if I ever decide to swap teams you’ll be the first person I call.”

Daisy laughed and Matt felt relived, he really didn’t know what to say and as awkward as this situation was he was glad Alex was here, she always knew what to do.

“Thanks Alex” said Daisy, wiping a tear from her cheek and pulling a brave smile “I’m just pretty mixed up at the moment but I’m glad you understand. Do you mind if I talk to Matt alone? I think we have some things to talk about.”

“Of course darling, I’ll be inside if you need me” she said as she wandered back inside, the noise blaring through as the door opened before silence fell between them.

He was more shocked than anything else although the more he thought about it the more it all made sense. Her loss of interest in spending time with him, the way she had lit up whenever she saw Alex or they talked about her, no wonder she had come onto set and been so enthusiastic about Alex coming out with them all tonight.

“Aren’t you going to say something?” asked Daisy breaking his train of thought.

“Oh yes, sorry, I’m just a bit surprised, but it’s okay, I mean I understand if that’s the way you feel, I just… how long have you been feeling this?”

She visibly relaxed at his reaction; obviously she had been expecting a worse response.

“Well I’ve always felt a bit like this since I was in my teens and I did like you, I really did, but lately, in the last month or so it’s all changed.”

“And Alex?”

“She was sort of the last push over the edge I guess, you probably don’t get it but I’ve always had a bit of a crush on her from her films and stuff but meeting her was something completely different and I was just a bit overwhelmed and tonight she was just there in fornt of me looking so amazing, and she smiled at me, and I wasn’t event thinking and I just kissed her. I know it was a mistake and I shouldn’t have done it, I’m sorry Matt.”

Matt completely got it, but this wasn’t the time to think about all that, he would have time for that later, right now he needed to sort things out with Daisy.

“It’s okay Daise, I understand. So what do you want to?”

“It’s probably best if we end things, I mean I need to work everything out and right now I just don’t think we’re right for each other.”

“I guess you’re right” he said “me being a man and all.”

They both chuckled and he was glad, this was going much better than it could have been.

“Thanks Matt, for understanding, it’s been really good and I hope we can stay friends.”

“Of course we can, do you want me to take you back to the flat?”

“No its fine, you stay here and have fun, I’m all packed for Monday already so I’m going to go stay with a friend tonight, but thanks, for everything”.

“You too Daise and I hope you find what you’re looking for.”

He waved down a cab for her and gave her a hug before heading back inside.

It was strange, he felt sad but also relieved. Things with Daisy had been strained for a while but at least everything made sense now. He laughed to himself at how it was Alex that had made Daisy realise her true feelings, if only that woman knew what effect she had on people.

He shouldn’t be smiling, not when his girlfriend had just kissed someone else and broken up with him, but he’d just realised that he was now a single man and that meant he was one step closer to Alex.

One less reason why he couldn’t tell her how he felt.

There was only one thing in his way now.

Ralph.


	8. Overjoyed (Bastille)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry again for the long wait.  
> Hope you enjoy it and I'd love to hear any feedback, be it good or bad.

Last night had been interesting, she was surprised when Daisy kissed her that’s for sure, even more so when she came out as gay and she almost couldn’t believe it when Matt came back in and told her that it was all over.

They had talked about it a little but Matt seemed distracted, as if he was on another planet, and he’d left pretty quickly to go home.  It must have come as such a shock to him but still, something about the way he’d reacted had seemed off to her. How willingly he’d accepted it was over, she could have sworn she’d even saw him smile, just a little, when he’d told her it was probably for the best and he’d even made a joke about not being surprised that she was turning women gay.

They were still watching Moll tonight as Karen had been feeling awful for most of the morning after drinking far too much and insisted that they shouldn’t deny a dying woman what she wanted.

They had agreed to watch it at her flat since it was likely to be the tidiest and Matt was bringing the DVD. She couldn’t help but wonder why he had it with him, probably just doing research on his co-stars, he was always diligent with his work like that.

She was about to make herself some tea when there was a knock on her door. She put down the mug she’d got out of the cupboard and went to open it wondering who it was; they weren’t due to start the film for another fifteen minutes.

“Hello Kingston” Matt said as she opened the door.

“Well hello there Matthew, either you’re being uncharacteristically punctual or I’m guessing you’re out of milk again.” She teased.

“Oi I’m always on time.” He protested. “Actually I was just feeling a bit lonely so I figured I’d come by early, I’ll go if you’re busy, I just wanted someone to talk to.”

Her heart warmed a little, he really was so sweet sometimes.

“I’m not busy at all Matt and I’ve always got time for you, come on in.”

She led him over to the couch and sat him down.

“I’ve just boiled the kettle if you’d like some tea?”

“That would be great thanks.”

“Milk and sugar?” She asked.

“Two please.”

“I should have guessed.” She chuckled as she made her way through to the kitchen.

Once she’d made the tea she sat down next to him and curled up, clutching her warm mug to her chest.

“How are you feeling today then?”

“Better than I should be really, I mean I’m sad and all because Daisy was great and we had a lot of fun times together but I think that this was coming for quite a bit, not her being gay or anything, I have to admit I didn’t really see that one coming, but we’d been drifting apart for a while now and we just stopped telling each other things so I guess it was inevitable that we split up.”

“I know how that feels, you sort of wonder what all went wrong.” She said, his words almost sounding like a description of her marriage, her future.

Her feelings must have shown on her face because suddenly his hand was on her shoulder and he had a look of genuine worry in his eyes.

“You know Alex I’m sure you can pull things back together with Ralph, I shouldn’t have said that, me and Daisy’s situation was different.”

“Oh no don’t worry about it, to be honest what happened between Daisy and you got me thinking about my own relationship and I know it’s awful but sometimes…oh never mind.”

“What Alex, you can tell me.” He said taking her hand.

“Well…sometimes I wonder whether I even want to fix things.”

She couldn’t read the expression on his face, he suddenly look conflicted, like he wanted to say something but couldn’t or wasn’t sure what to say.

“But hey I shouldn’t be talking about me, you’re the one who just broke up with someone.”

“No Alex I’ll be fine, you’re the one who needs taking care of, you know you’re worth so much more than you think you are, you’re worth so much more than him.”

His eyes were intense as he looked into hers and his grip on her hand tightened as she laced her fingers through his and she wondered what on earth she’d do without this man, this wondrous, perfect man who seemed to care about her so much.

Why did she have to be married to someone like Ralph when there were people like Matt around, well when there was Matt, not that he would ever want her anyway. Her heart ached at that and she could feel tears start to sting her eyes. She proabably would have started to cry but her thoughts were interrupted by the sound of loud knocking on her door and a still slightly hungover Scot announcing her arrival.

\---

“The doors open.” Alex called from the couch, removing her hand from his as she got up to greet Kaz and he felt a little emptier without it.

“Hellooo everybody.” Said Karen as she sauntered in, popcorn in hand “and how are all of you feeling this evening?”

“Probably better than you.” Joked Matt. “How much did you bloody drink last night Kaz?”

“Oh god it doesn’t bare thinking about, I don’t think I’ll be drinking for months.”

“Yeah, yeah that’s what you said last time, and that was a week ago.”

She stack her tongue out at him and came over to the couch to sit on his left, he’d specifically not moved over so that he was guaranteed a seat next to Alex.

“So how was your evening?” she asked. “I have to admit that I don’t remember much of it.”

He explained to her everything that had happened whilst Alex put the movie in. She was very supportive, even if she did joke that she wasn’t surprised that Daisy had fallen for Alex over him and that she’d kiss Alex any day of the week.

“Lights or no lights?” Alex asked.

“No lights.” Replied Karen. “Lights are still giving me headaches after last night.”

Alex switched them off and sat down next to Matt and cuddled into a cushion after pressing play.

The film was long and unsurprisingly Karen was asleep half way through. He’d always liked this film, who wouldn’t, but it was a whole different thing watching it whilst Alex was here, curled up next to him, he really hoped that she hadn’t worked out why he had the DVD.

He’d been able to control himself pretty well until the scene with Daniel Craig came on. Alex was on top of him and he was kissing down her body, taking a nipple into his mouth and the look on Alex’s face was driving him mad. He felt his cock twitch at the sight and his hand subconsciously went to it and he started to stroke himself through his sweatpants. He suddenly realised what he was doing as he felt himself get harder and harder by the second, suddenly thankful for the darkness and quickly looked over to Alex who had thankfully fallen asleep as well.

He wasn’t going to be able to make this go away so he got up carefully, trying not to wake either of them, and made his way to her bathroom.

Locking the door he groaned as he released himself from his boxers. Leaning his head on the wall he slowly stared to stroke himself, the images of Alex naked and moaning playing through his mind. He wanted it to be him under her, making her react that way, kissing his way across her perfect breasts.

He started to quicken his pace, his thumb brushing the head making him grunt, spreading the liquid there. He turned to lean his back against the wall and saw that her bra was hanging from the door, it was simple black lace but the sight of it sent a wave of pleasure through him, the image of her wearing it making him impossibly harder. He could hear the film playing through the door and he hadn’t really noticed it until the sounds of her moans reached his ears.

It was enough to drive him crazy and he quickly felt his balls start to tighten and a heat build at the base of his cock as his hand worked himself furiously. Through the door he heard her cry out in release and it was enough to throw him over the edge, groaning loudly as he came, her name on his lips.

He slumped to the floor breathing heavily, his slick cock still throbbing in his hand and his boxers round his ankles.

“Matt are you alright, I thought I heard a shout?”

His eyes flew open in panic, oh god she’d heard, had she, oh fuck what was he going to say? He stood up quickly, pulling up his pants and saw himself in the mirror, the proof of what he’d been doing all over his t-shirt.

“I’m fine.” He called, mind racing to find an excuse. “I turned the tap on too fast and got sprayed with hot water is all, sorry if I woke you up.”

He stripped off his shirt and quickly tried to clean it in the sink, both confirming his story and getting rid of the evidence at the same time.

He opened the door to find her leaning against the wall opposite, a naughty smile on the corner of her lips, her tank top dangerously low and her curls tumbling over her bare shoulders causing his cock to stir again.

“Oh Matthew you silly boy.” She said in a low husky voice as she stepped towards him taking his shirt and smiled as her eyes raked his now naked chest. She chuckled as she walked away with his shirt, her hips swaying leaving him standing there speechless. “Those taps really are a nightmare, I’ve gotten myself wet quite a few times since moving in here.”

He swallowed as he started to harden again, unable to stop himself from finding a double meaning in her words. He quickly made his way back to the couch whilst she put his shirt in the drier, covering the ever growing bulge in his pants with a cushion.

She sat down next to him again and leaned into his shoulder and they watched the rest if the film without further talk of the incident which he was very grateful for.

He thought he’d gotten away with it until he was leaving. Kaz had wondered back to her flat looking bleary and he was following her out the door when Alex caught his hand.

“Wait darling.” she said and his breath caught, the look in her eyes was mesmerising, pupils wide and dark.

She paused, the words stuck in her throat and her gaze dropping to the floor “Um, you’re shirt, here its dry.” She said handing it to him, what she had been wanting to say lost.

“Thanks, you didn’t have to dry it, it was my fault, I couldn’t help myself.”

Her eyes snapped back up to his and he realised what he’d just said didn’t exactly sound like he was talking about a tap, and if the smile that came to her lips was any indication, she knew it.

“This was fun, we should do it again sometime.”

“We most certainly should.” He said suddenly feeling confident.

“See you on set tomorrow.”

“See you Alex.” He said as he kissed her forehead and pulled her into a hug. It wasn’t until it brushed against her thigh that he remembered the semi that he still had and he quickly released her from the hug, his cheeks burning as he blushed. He ran his hand through his hair praying that she hadn't noticed, her guessing what he'd done was one thing, feeling it was quite another.

"Night Matt." she said, seemingly not noticing or caring what had just happened, smiling as she leant up and kissed his cheek.

"Glad you liked my stuff." She said as she closed the door giggling, her words from their first meeting bringing a smile to his face.

"You’re acting isn’t half bad either." He called back as he walked down the hall and heard her laugh.

Maybe, just maybe, he had a chance.

 

 


	9. Without A Word (Birdy)

The next few weeks of filming went well and neither of them brought up what had happened at Alex’s flat, but something had definitely changed and Matt was happy to find it was not for the worse.

The flirting went to a whole other level and sometimes he really did have to stop himself from doing all the things he said he was going to do to her, that wedding ring on her finger always reminding him that it was all futile, all just a joke.

It was her last day filming today and even though she’d be back in a couple of months to film the next two episodes she was in he couldn’t help but feel sad.

He’d struggled a little with some scenes with her he had to admit, and not just the ones where she was wearing that magnificent dress. She was such a good actor, the expressions on her face were so genuine that he kept having to remind himself that the emotions he saw weren’t real, they weren’t hers. In one scene they had been in the control panel of the Byzantium and the Doctor was shouting at River, getting so angry at her in his desperation and the look on her face made him forget his lines the first time they did it. He’d almost thought it was him making Alex feel like that and he couldn’t stand the thought of that, he would never hurt her, not ever.

Tonight they were out in the forest since the seemingly constant rain in Wales had pushed these scenes to the end of the schedule. Alex and he had done their bit and she could have gone but instead she sat with him off set as he read out his lines for Kaz’s part.

The director Adam called cut and they started to reset the shot.

“She’s doing great out there isn’t she.” Said Alex.

“Yeah she really is, if that were me walking around out there with my eyes shut I would have probably tripped over thin air, knocked over a camera and landed on top of an angel.”

“We do seem to have a habit of falling on top of people don’t we.”

“I however do it by accident.” He said chuckling.

“And I only do it when a certain someone has it written into the script.” She said with a devious smile on her lips.

He leant in close, her hair tickling against his cheek “Well I knew I just needed to give you an excuse."

“Oh Matt you are awful” she said laughing as she swatted his chest.

“Does this mean I’m winning?” He asked, hoping he’d finally gotten one up on her in their flirting contest.

“Not a chance.” She said smiling “Just you wait until I come back.” The reminder that she was leaving again causing him to wince.

They settled into a comfortable silence as they sat on their log, watching everyone around them. He noticed her shiver and took his coat off, wrapping it around them both. She leaned into his shoulder and he could feel her slow warm breaths against his neck, he was the one shivering now but it had nothing to do with the cold.

She stayed there with him for the rest of the shoot, she had a train to catch in the morning yet she stayed anyway and his heart almost ached with happiness.

Finally at one in the morning the director called it a day and Matt unwilling removed the arm he’d put around Alex’s shoulders.

He didn’t want the day to end, he didn’t want to say goodbye, he was going to miss her so much.

“Any chance you could drive me back Matt?” She asked, giving him the excuse he needed to spend just a little more time with her.

“Yeah of course, thought you came with Kaz?”

“I did but she’s going to stay with a friend for the weekend and she’s staying with her tonight.”

“I see, well then this way Miss Kingston, your car awaits.” He said impersonating a chauffeur causing her to laugh as she took his arm, god he was going to miss that laugh, and he couldn’t help but let a smile come to his face.

A smile that was a little wider because she hadn’t complained when he didn’t call her Mrs.

\---

On the drive back to their flats neither of them said much, if she was honest with herself it was probably because she was worried about what she might say, what she wished were possible.

The night they had watched Moll together something had changed. He had woken her when he got up from the sofa and when she had passed the bathroom to get a sweater she couldn’t help but hear. At first she wasn’t sure what he was up to in there, although she had her suspicions, but when he let out a loud groan of her name she was fairly certain.

She hadn’t known what to think about it but it had made her feel…hopeful (not to mention turned on), that her attraction towards him wasn't completely one sided.

They had joked about it and very uncharacteristically of her she didn’t start to over think things. Back on set everything was fine, better than fine, they were all having a great time together and she’d never been happier.

These last few days however had been different, she was leaving tomorrow, away from Who, away from Matt, back to Ralph and she was dreading it. He'd gotten worse over the last few weeks, his temper running high, his apologetic visit forgotten and she couldn't help but see what was in the papers about him out and about with other women, nothing concrete but she couldn't help but feel suspicious.

Ralph was still her husband and there was a part of her that still loved him, that wanted to make it work but a significantly larger part was falling for someone else, was falling for Matt.

She didn’t know what to do about it, she didn’t want to leave but what was she supposed to say, despite all the flirting this was probably nothing more than lust for Matt, if it was even that, and she couldn’t bring herself to ruin the relationship they had because of how she felt.

They arrived at their building and made their way towards the elevator together. Matt managed to trip as they were walking across the parking lot and grabbed for her hand as she reached out to catch him.

“Good thing there are no cameras here for you to knock over.” She joked.

He laughed but he seemed distracted, the witty response she was expecting never coming. They carried on walking and she didn’t notice until they reached her door that they still hadn’t let go of each other’s hands, their fingers laced together.

They stopped outside her flat and neither said anything for a couple of seconds, Matt looking at his feet, holding onto her hand just a little tighter.

“Thanks for driving me back.” She said breaking the silence.

He looked up at her, sadness in his eyes. “No problem…you’re leaving tomorrow so I-”

She cut him off with a hug, burying her face into his chest.

“I’m going to miss you Matt.” _More than you know._

His hand released hers and he tightly wrapped his arms around her waist.

“Me too Kingston.” He said as he kissed her forehead. “So much.”

“We’ll keep in touch and I’ll be back before you know it.”

“It’s months Alex, what am I going to do without you?”

“You’ll be fine sweetie, you’re doing an incredible job as the Doctor, you don’t need me any more, you never did.”

“That’s not what I meant.” He said as he pulled back to look at her, his hand coming to gently rest under her chin, tilting it up to him.

“What am I going to do without you.” He said as a tear ran down his cheek and he closed the distance between them. He stopped just short of her lips resting his forehead against hers, his brow furrowed and eyes shut tight. Her heart clenched and she felt the wetness of her own tears spill from her eyes.

She couldn’t leave like this, couldn’t leave _him_ like this, she hadn’t wanted to admit it, even though she’d known for a long time, but she loved him and it was killing her to see him like this.

She put her hand on his cheek and leant up to kiss him, her eyes fluttering shut.

It was as if time had stopped and all she could feel was the soft warmth of his lips. At first he didn’t respond as if in shock but suddenly his lips were pushing against her own, his arms pulling her tighter to him.

They parted after a short time, smiles, tears and confusion on both their faces.

“Good bye Alex” He said as he gave her one last hug. “I’ll see you soon.”

“Goodbye Matt”.

And then he was gone and she was alone and all she could think about was that she loved him, she loved Matt Smith and maybe, just maybe, he loved her too, and nothing was going to change that.

Not even Ralph.

And it was then that she knew it.

She was going to ~~get rid of~~  end it with Ralph.

 


	10. Hearts A Mess (Gotye)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been awful and left writing this chapter for over a month partly because it was difficult, partly because life sort of got in the way and possibly because I found a new ship and I sailed away into the distance on it.  
> But as always these two will always be my otp so here is the next chapter - sorry that I took so long.

Once she was back inside her flat, the realisation of what she had done hit her. She had just cheated on Ralph and, despite the fact that in practice there weren't really married anymore, the guilt flooded over her almost immediately. 

She paced around the room trying to think about what she would say to him, she knew she had to tell him, but she didn't know how, and half of her mind wouldn't focus on the problem at hand as it kept replaying what had just happened outside her door over and over again.

A car was supposed to be picking her up at 7, but she knew she would have gone mad thinking about it all if she waited that long, so she called and managed to get them to pick her up in half an hour. 

So, there she was, getting into a car at 3 in the morning, leaving the man she loved to face the man she was married to, and she couldn't help but wonder why she hadn't thought to do in sooner.

On the drive back to London she thought about all she wanted to say to Ralph. She needed to tell him how they weren't right for each other anymore and that he was in the wrong but so was she. She was a reasonable person and she knew that it took both of them to make the marriage fall apart, despite the fact it was mostly him, but it probably wouldn't end all that well if she started saying that. 

The journey back to London didn't take long and she had everything planned out in her head, but as the car turned onto Cranley Place where their marital home was she started to have doubts.

Should she really tell him about Matt? She started to have a hasty debate with herself as the car pulled up.

There was nothing certain between her and Matt even though she knew how she felt.  
It would probably just distract from the fact that she was leaving him because their marriage wasn't working and not because she had found someone else.  
Would he even care if she'd kissed someone else?  
Would he ever even find out if she didn't say anything?  
No, she couldn't lie, she had to tell him. Ugh, why did she have to be such a morally upright person? Sometimes she thought it would make life a whole lot easier if she were capable of doing the wrong thing. Then again, she was about to leave her husband, as much as she hated him she knew this was never going to be easy.

She was broken out of her reverie when her driver opened her door. Thanking him, and taking her bag, she slowly made her way up the steps to the door.

Quietly turning the key in the lock so that she wouldn't wake him she tentatively unlocked the door. She softly put her bag down in the hall and made her way to the kitchen as it was barely 6 yet and he probably wasn't up, let alone not expecting her back until 10 at the earliest.

She popped the kettle on and started to get out a mug when she suddenly froze as her eyes locked on something on the counter.

Two wine glasses. One with sickly pink lipstick on the rim. 

And that's when she heard it, the shrill laugh of a woman coming from upstairs.

* * *

Matt was tired when he got onto set the next morning. Tired because they'd been shooting late last night, tired because he couldn't stop thinking about kissing Alex, and tired because she was gone and it physically hurt knowing he wasn't going to see her walk onto set and lighten up his day any time soon.

He still managed to make it through the morning though and aced almost all his scenes. When he acted he really became the doctor and it helped him forget his own emotions, but then again, the Doctor was starting to miss River, just a little bit. 

He'd managed to avoid really talking to anyone all day, he just wasn't in the mood and was worried he might let something slip about last night, Alex was married after all and he had no idea where they stood. 

His plan was almost working until a flash of red hair came seemingly from out of nowhere and suddenly he was being dragged outside.

"Right mister, I don't know what's wrong but you're going to talk to me about it right now." Karen huffed. "Ok, so I _do_ know why you're sad, but being your friend and all I can't sit here and watch you suffer."

"What! You know!" He exclaimed.

She sighed as she rolled her eyes. "Of course I know, everyone on set knows, even Arthur knows and he's known you for what, five hours?"

He was practically speechless, had he really been that obvious? "H-how?" He managed to stammer out.

"Oh really Matt, I'd have to be blind not to have noticed, and deaf for that matter, you two are always so happy together and I've seen the way you look at her, not to mention the way she looks at you."

"What? How does she look at me." He asked, a childlike shine  coming to his eyes.

"You actually need me to explain it to you don't you?" Karen asked with exasperation.

"Well, I mean, she um, I mean we, we, last night..."

"Spit it out man!" She exclaimed frustratedly.

"Well we kissed, last night, before she left, and she was crying and I was crying and ,oh god Kaz, what have I done, I've ruined everything". He shouted as he slumped to the floor with his arms over his head. 

She came and sat down next to him and pulled his arms away from his face. "Hey now, don't get all worried, don't you see Matt, she cares about you, she really does, don't you understand how conflicted she must be feeling? She's married, but she obviously cares about you a great deal, and she'll have doubts no wonder, worrying about her age and why you'd be interested in her."

He almost couldn't beleive what he was hearing. "What? I'd never let anything as stupid as age even cross my mind, god Kaz, she's the best woman I've ever meant, I mean I've been in love with her since I first looked up into her eyes when I fell at her feet the first day I met her."

"You love her?" Kaz asked, a look of awe on her face.

"Yes." He said without hesitation, he was more sure that he loved Alex Kingston than he had been of anything before.

Before they had a chance to say any more the set door opened and Arthur burst through with a newspaper clutched in his hand.

"Have you guys seen this?" He asked pointing at the paper. "I can't beleive it."

"What is it?" said Kaz as she snatched it away from.

Matt looked over her shoulder and saw a picture of what looked like Ralph kissing a woman as he opened the door to a house and his heart practically stopped as he read the headline.

_Fiennes cheating on wife of  10 years with unknown woman._

 


	11. Over The Love (Florence and the Machine)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok so I've been reading a lot of Harry Potter fanfic recently so I may or may not have accidentally written Ralph a little bit like Voldemort - not that he's much better than the Dark Lord when it comes to Alex so hopefully it still works.

The first thing Alex did was let a small laugh escape her lips.

It was almost ridiculous how things worked out wasn’t it? Here she’d been about to break with panic and guilt about what she was going to say, ready to try and spare his feelings as much as possible, and he was upstairs shagging some other woman without a care in the world.

It was when the sound of a bump and more giggling reached her ears that the rage that should have been her initial reaction finally got round to showing up. And boy was it one hell of a rage.

She hastily but quietly made her way up the stairs, ignoring the paper that had come through her door with a picture of Ralph plastered on the cover, and slowly turned the handle of the door where the noise was coming from, their marital bedroom.

Alex stood in the doorway with her arms folded, waiting for one of them to notice. Ralph was on top of the woman who looked almost 20 years his junior, how ironic, and was oblivious to his wife as he continued to fuck the woman underneath him. It was not until the other woman opened her eyes and stopped her exaggerated moans that he stopped and followed her gaze to the door, to Alex.

She thought she could handle it, that she was strong enough to catch him in the act and confront him but she could feel her emotions start to get the better of her as his eyes met hers and she swiftly left the room.

He seemed to be frozen for a second before quickly scrambling off the woman and throwing a blanket over her as he struggled to pull his boxers on. Alex had walked from the room, her heart racing and tears threatening to spill over and was on the landing half way down the stairs when he caught up with her and grabbed her by the wrist.

“Alex, wait I-“

“What Ralph? What? It’s not what it looks like? You’ve made a mistake? Or do you not even care? There is nothing you can say to fix this, we were broken well before today and you know it.” She snapped at him.  “You know, I came here today to end things with you as amicably as possible but clearly that’s going to be impossible now!”

He looked even more shocked than he had been at her catching him with another woman when she said that.

“You were going to end it with me? Are you serious?” Ralph asked with clear disbeleif.

“Of course I’m bloody well serious Ralph, we’ve been leading up to this for ages, we barely see or talk to each other any more and we obviously don’t make each other happy.” She said gesturing up the stairs to the woman who still lay naked in their bed.

“Well maybe it has but it’s as much your fault as mine!” He argued.

“For fucks sake Ralph, you’re the one fucking some blonde bimbo in our house on the day you knew I’d be coming home, don’t you have any sense of decency?! Besides, our marriage has been on the rocks for years but these last few months have made me realise that it should have been over a long time ago.”

“Oh these last few months, I see, jesus I thought I was just being paranoid but I’ve seen the way you look at him.” Ralph said accusingly.

“What? What are you talking about?” She asked, truly perplexed.

“Now, now, don’t play me for a fool Alex, you’re a damn good actress but you’re not going to pull one over on me. That young boy from set, what was his name? Matt. When I visited you I saw how you were together, its plain as day now I think about it how you feel about each other, but it’s no matter, because he will never be able to give you what I give you, Alex.”

His grip on her wrist loosened a little as his other hand came to caress her face. He took a step towards her and slowly brought his face closer to hers and rested his forehead against her own.

“Open your eyes Alex.” He purred, the voice of the man she used to deeply love still having such a strong hold over her that she felt a shiver ripple its way through her, and as her breath shuddered from her she opened her eyes. He was so close, his patrician face as calm and serene as ever, and a small devilish smile on his lips, his mercurial nature allowing him to change his emotions so effortlessly.

“Alex, don’t you still feel it, what we have together, I know you still love me.” He purred, his haughtiness infuriating her as he edged his way closer to her, his lips a mere centimetre from her own and a salacious look in his eyes. “Can that stupid boy really make you feel the way I do?”

She ripped herself from his hands and stepped back from him. If he’d have done this before she’d left to film Who, things would have been different, she probably would have let him kiss her, well if he hadn’t just been fucking some other woman that was, but now things were different, now she had Matt, and she had no love left for Ralph, it all belonged to someone else now.

“He is not a boy Ralph, and he’s not stupid, he is a man, and he's one hell of a better man than you ever were! But this isn’t about him, this is about you and me and what we’ve done to each other all these years and I’ve had enough.” She said, revelling in the look of disappointment and anger etched across his face. “I want a divorce.” She shouted as she marched off down the stairs, grabbed her still packed bag, and swung open the front door.

“Good bye Ralph.” She called as the door slammed behind her and on that part of her life.

Ralph was still stood on the stairs too in shock to move as his wife and his pride were now gone forever.


	12. Young and Beautiful (Lana Del Rey)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry that I took waaaaayyyyyyyyyy to long to finish this story, very poor show from me, but here, at last, is the final chapter.

The door closed behind her and she let out a giggle, a wonderful sound filled with freedom, happiness and anticipation.

What to do now?

Her only though was Matt, what else would she do now other than go back to see him?

Alex was too tired to drive, it wouldn't be safe after she'd had so little sleep, and was releived to see that her driver hadn't left yet, was still outside her house with a cup of coffee and the morning paper in hand.

She saw him double take as he looked at the paper and then up to her house, swapping between the two as he noticed that the images matched, realisation dawning on his face as he saw Alex marching with determinatipon down the steps towards him.

"Where to mam?" He asked as he quickly downed his coffee and took her bag.

"Back to Cardiff, I forgot something very important."

* * *

Matt, quite literally, had to be dragged back to set my Karen and Arthur, was so determined to go and find Alex, to help her through whatever she was going through, maybe knocking out Ralph while he was there, that it had taken a lot of persuasion to stay on set and finish the important days work.

Unlike this morning, when he had been able to keep him tumultuous emotions in check, now he felt all muddled up, couldn't quite stop his own feelings from seeping into the doctor.

"Cut!" Called Steven at the end of a take. "Matt, come here while they reset." He asked, gesturing Matt away from the rest of the crew. "You're playing him too angry." He started to explain. "I know the doctor is an emotional person, and you do such a great job of showing that, but this isn't the scene for it. What's got you bothered?"

"Maybe the doctor just misses his wife." Matt joked, the intended humour lacking from his words.

"Who says she's really your wife?" Said a voice filled with innuendos and mischief from behind him, and his heart leapt from his chest. "Maybe it's all an elaborate lie?"

"Because how could the doctor ever resist marrying her?" Matt retorted with a teasing tone, still a little to scared to turn around, but, judging by the knowing look on Stevens face, he figured it must be her.

Alex.

He turned, beaming, to see her standing there, arms folded as she leaned casually against that wall.

"Honey, I'm home." She said with one of her smiles, her perfect, beautiful smiles.

"And what sort of time do you call this?" Matt replied.

"I need to remember those lines for next season..." He heard Steven mutter in the background and they both broke into laughter.

Matt ran to her and scooped her tightly into his arms, spinning her around.

"I love you." Was all the words he could find to say.

She beamed, her eyes starting to glisten and he couldn't help but kiss her, fearing he might explode with happiness when she responded with full force. 

"Told you she loved you too." Karen called from across the room, and they broke apart laughing.

They may have a difficult journey ahead of them but right now, they were happy, they loved each other, and that was all that mattered.

* * *

  **Epilogue**

Alex and Ralph divorced quickly and relatively quietly, neither wanting to cause a scene.

Matt and she started seeing each other discreetly, all the crew knew, but they didn't want the whole world to know just yet.

Both were thrilled to hear that River Song would be returning for season 6, it sure made some of those more, intimate, scenes, far more fun.

Eventually, Matt decided that, in order to be with Alex, it would be best to move to the US with her.

So, even though it was hard leaving Who, he knew that the adventure he was just about to go on would be just as good, because, of course, the Doctor's adventures with River were always the best.

**Fin**

 

 

 

 


End file.
